So....I promised myself when I started this blog that I would try not to be a "Negative Nelly". I can see that I have been slipping. Granted, this year, so far, has not been the optimum point of success I was anticipating. But, "silk purse out of a sow's ear" and all that, you'd think I would be able to adapt and overcome...
I found out today that a fellow student from the Art Department passed away Saturday morning. She just went to sleep on Friday and didn't wake up. I didn't know her personally but she interviewed me for my Senior BFA Show and we said hi to each other on campus. Sad. Then today, when Mara got home from school, she informed us that her German professor passed away. What? Geez....
Adapt and overcome...
Last week I was informed by one of my "acquaintances" his last day where we work will be May 10th. The company he works for was underbid for their services and he would be required to take a large pay-cut to stay with the new company in the same position. This is the same situation I faced last August. Oh, we were kept at our current rates, but some erroneous information was apparently passed along about our vacations. Let's just say, in all likelihood, I won't see a vacation day until July. Hopefully, I will be with a new employer by then. I was mentally prepared to leave here before my friend did because I would still be able to contact him. This will no longer be an option. Yay. Life isn't fair, is it? I am REALLY going to miss you buddy.
Adapt and overcome....
A couple of weeks ago a tree broke on my property...right up against my house. It looks almost like it was struck by lightning and split 2 ways down the middle. Needless to say, there is quite the mess in my front yard. Pappy dropped the chainsaw off at the Co-op to be PM'd but I simply DREAD knowing we have to chop this thing down. Mara, Pappy and I are not really a prime example of a group of trained tree-trimmers...I'm getting a little long in the tooth to be out there doing physical labor. (What I'm REALLY saying here is that I'm old, fat and out of shape!!) Pappy needs to be careful and, well, Mara can pick up a car battery (inside joke). I'm actually kinda really freaking out about this.
Adapt and overcome....
Then, my gypsy van croaked. Not only did I have to buy a new vehicle, I had to clean out my old one (if you had ever seen inside my van you would understand my pain...).
Adapt and overcome...
And then there is this whole job search thingy....yeah. Depressing in itself. I read someone's blog the other day about when the author was in the job market. She was expressing how she was receiving emails from scammers that sound legitimate and how hard she took it when she found out they were bogus. I received a phone call today from one such organization. Luckily, I was napping and didn't answer the call (I have a propensity of answering valid questions with gibberish when I am just the teensiest bit asleep - and I am aware of this....). Remembering the statement in the blog, I Googled the number - I thought it quite odd that the number originated from Georgia but the caller left a Cincinnati number - and found out it was some sort of "Pay Us and We Will Find You a Job" deal. Nice...kick a girl when she's down. I dug a little deeper wondering where they obtained my cellphone number and realized that I recently re-posted my resume on Monster and CareerBuilders and that is where, in all likelihood, it was acquired. Can't win for trying.
Adapt and overcome...
Then, there were the Great Illnesses of January, February, March, April.... Pneumonia, gallbladder problems, food poisoning...yeah, I don't want to talk about it anymore. On a weird note, though, I've been eating lemons like they're going out of style!
Adapt and overcome....
Now, to get to the point of all of this rambling...a couple of years ago I was reading about how people make New Year's Resolutions every year and how often they are broken by the middle of January. You know what I mean...."I'm going to lose 20lbs this year!"...then by January 20th they're snacking on a whole chocolate cake for breakfast. Well, I found an article which was trying to help break the cycle. It stated instead of resolutions we should make "intentions". I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I typed up a list of my intentions that year. I was pretty serious about changing my outlook and how I carry myself. I try so hard not to be fatalistic and mean but I found myself starting to sound like a couple of the fools who work with me. That scared me. I try to be nice to everybody - you know, catch more flies with honey and all - but I heard some of the things coming out of my mouth and I knew immediately I needed to change. I do not want to be associated with that view on the world. Well, lately I've been having a hard time coping with just life in general and I kept coming back to thinking about my intentions. I wanted to revisit the list and see if I have improved myself - even if it was infinitesimal - and if I could use any of my own words to my advantage now. Tonight, when I got to work, I was frantically searching for my "manifesto", knowing I had saved it somewhere here. Holy crap. Frantic is a nice word. I am already a freaking nervous wreck about everything - house, tree, health, school, job, vacation, friends, car, flight MH370, Korean ferry - everything is making me crazy. (I probably shouldn't put that on here since I am hoping prospective employers will view my blog.) I finally found what I was looking for. I haven't re-read it yet, but I sincerely want to share it with everyone. I can only remember some of the points of which I wanted to improve. I'm sure there are a few anyone can relate to. Well...here goes....
Start spending time with the
right people.
Start facing your problems
head on.
Start being honest with
yourself about everything.
Start making your own
happiness a priority.
Start being yourself,
genuinely and proudly.
Start noticing and living in
the present.
Start valuing the lessons
your mistakes teach you.
Start being more polite to
yourself.
Start enjoying the things you
already have.
Start creating your own
happiness.
Start giving your ideas and
dreams a chance.
Start believing that you’re
ready for the next step.
Start entering new
relationships for the right reasons.
Start giving new people you
meet a chance.
Start competing against an
earlier version of yourself.
Start cheering for other
people’s victories.
Start looking for the silver
lining in tough situations.
Start forgiving yourself and
others.
Start helping those around
you.
Start listening to your own
inner voice.
Start being attentive to your
stress level and take short breaks.
Start noticing the beauty of
small moments.
Start accepting things when
they are less than perfect.
Start working toward your
goals every single day.
Start being more open about
how you feel.
Start taking full
accountability for your own life.
Start actively nurturing your
most important relationships.
Start concentrating on the
things you can control.
Start focusing on the
possibility of positive outcomes.
Start noticing how wealthy
you are right now.
Well...I can honestly say that I have tried, really hard, and have actually succeeded in more than a few of my intentions!! I still have a lot of work to do, though, since I can feel myself backsliding.
Buck up, Anna, all is not lost!!
I think I am going to print out my list and paste it in my journal and this way I can have it on hand when I feel I need a helping hand. (If you know me, you know I would rather die than ask someone else for help...I am strong! I am independent! -Yeah, right.) Obviously, I need all the help I can get.
Adapt and overcome....
I also promise that I am back to taking some photos. I have a few on my desktop at home just waiting for me to post. I just need a little push to get myself back on track. Being surrounded by green once again should help. Yay, Spring! Yay, good intentions!!
Thank you for your time...be careful, please.
Until next time...
